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Readings: Luke 1:26-38
I am not a particularly good decision-maker. I can decide, but I don’t like when things need an answer time-yesterday-hurry-up-already.
To feel confident about a decision, I usually need lists, research, some what-if wonderings, a few sleepless nights, and a partridge in a pear tree.
It’s hard for me to choose in the moment (I can decide where to go out to eat most days, despite what my husband might tell you). Big decisions leave me afraid I’m not considering a point of view, or I’m missing a vital piece of information.
As I read Mary’s story and watch as she learns of the impending birth of Jesus, I can’t help but wonder how I would react in a similar circumstance. Except I know.
“Uh, yeah, I hear you, angel, but can I have just a minute? I need some time to think about this…Can I phone a friend to ask their opinion?”
Mary was young, most likely a teenager, when the angel visited her. I know what I was like as a teenager: selfish, a dreamer, excited, and fearful of the life ahead of me.
I consciously made choices that kept me from having a baby throughout my teen and young adult years. It’s doubtful I would’ve said yes to such a thing, given a choice. The life that awaited me was exciting and full of potential, and I wanted full access to that.
But Mary did say yes. She gave up whatever expectations she had for her life with a simple, one-syllable word.
By saying yes, she opened herself up to a host of worldly problems. Joseph could, and probably would, seek to divorce her. The loss of his commitment could mean she’d be left to fend for herself on the outskirts of society, or worse – she could be stoned to death.
By accepting the angel’s proposal, she gave up her reputation. She put her hopes and dreams for her life on hold.
As I reflect on Mary’s story, God brings to mind the value of saying yes before we’re ready. There’s a time and place for lists and research but saying yes before we have all the information allows faith to do its work.
Mary’s yes to carrying and raising Jesus was weighty. Her response held both joy and sorrow, laughter and tears, maybe even excitement and dread. I suspect she knew the risks, but Mary said yes anyway.
I’m grateful, and envious, of Mary’s yes. To know so assuredly is a feeling I’m not well acquainted with.
Maybe I’m taking too much of her humanness out of the equation. Perhaps she didn’t know for sure, making her yes that much more powerful. Mary stepped out in faith without knowing all the possibilities.
Our decisions, both big and small, also offer up the opportunity for both blessing and uncertainty. Despite the risks, there is something we’re being called to say yes to before we’re ready.
Thankfully, there is space for all the emotions that come with living this earthly life. God doesn’t ask us to choose one way or the other. He asks us to lean into faith and trust that he will walk with us through it all.
Journal Prompt: Where is God asking you to say yes before you’re ready? Spend time bringing your concerns and hopes to him.
